11/28/2023 0 Comments Cranky kong git gudMiyamoto used my name as the game's title, since I was the strongest character of the game. He wanted a name that gave the "stupid ape" impression (not going to say anything, nope nope nope), and he had a dictionary. Well…he was over there in Japan, where they don't always speak English s'good. But how did I get named Donkey Kong? Monkeys aren't donkeys, after all. Miyamoto as an antagonist that's "nothing too evil or repulsive" (hmph), so I ended up in the form of an ape. ![]() What the company needed (among other things) was their actual own stable of characters, after attempts to secure the Popeye license fell through.Īnd that's where I come into this, finally! Things were getting desperate, so the president of the company-the late Hiroshi Yamauchi (may he rest in peace) asked Shigeru Miyamoto, who had been working at the company for just a few years on at that point, to design a game that the unsold Radar Scope units could be converted into. ![]() So! It all began at the beginning of The '80s (that's 1980s, if you didn't realize), the era where the video arcade was alive and thriving! Pac-Man and his family were gorging themselves on ghosts, dots, and cherries, Frogger was trying to cross roads and not get himself ran over, the Space Invaders were upsetting the availability of Japanese yen, and… Radar Scope was crashing and burning-the latest in Japanese videogame developer Nintendo's attempts to break into the North American market. Let me clear up all of this confusion and start over from the beginning. But to be fair, that big doofus has proven himself to a worthy successor of the name Donkey Kong. and to think people either believe he's me during my prime or my son, but that's because those lazy boneheads at Nintendo couldn't keep consistency if their whole company depended on it. I tell ya, they're missing out on what a real game is and have games like mine to thank for allowing them to have all of that malarkey! Look at my no-good grandson, what with his tie-wearing, his bongo playing, his peg-swinging, banana chompin'…! Ugh. Seems like nowadays, if it doesn't have a gun, realistic graphics, sports teams, huge worlds, or a complicated story, people aren't interested. Thing is, the ape you're looking at was the original Donkey Kong - back when all it took was four frames of animation and an infinite supply of barrels to strike terror into the hearts of game players. See here, most people these days know me as Cranky Kong - can't rightly imagine why, though. Hold up, so you're actually here to learn about my history now, are ya? Well, it's about time, if I do say so m'self! Right, where to begin… it was one of you tropers again, eh? Jumping from page to page all day and night-drives an old ape to tears, really. ( snort) Huh-what?! Who started up that blasted music again? Can't an old ape get any peace and quiet around here?! Listening to one of these three tracks while reading is also highly recommended.) ( The following article is best read in the voices of either Aron Tager or Fred Armisen. "And this was developed with the latest state-of-the-art 3D workthingys, was it?"
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